My daughter asked me to write a note for her. It reminded me of a day long ago when she was in school and needed an excuse for not doing something she was required to do. Only this time, she has done all she can and more and still she feels she needs her mother’s help. I am honored.
For you see, she wants me to write a simple note to whom it may concern about her precious daughter, my granddaughter Lexi affectionately known as Lou Lou to many in the family. Recently diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder and the possibility of falling under the autism umbrella, my daughter and son-in-law are doing all they can to come to some definitive answer for her behavior. It is easier for the specialist to say what is NOT wrong with her than what IS wrong and no one seems to agree.
Each week she goes to an Occupational Therapist and Speech Therapist and at the same time is going to the public school specialists for evaluation tests. One may say she is behind while the other puts her three years ahead of herself in some things. Ideally, she can be placed in the early childhood education program at the public school, at age three; so that by the time she enters Kindergarten she will be age appropriate. But getting there is half the battle.
After observing Lexi for four days and being home alone with her two of those days, I shared my thoughts with my daughter. She and her husband were impressed that I got it; I really got it. But their frustration level dealing with doctors, specialists, bureaucrats in the school system is weighing them down. (And I certainly mean no offense to the doctors or teachers as my son-in-law works in the medical field and my daughter works at a middle school.) Maybe this is why the whole process is so over-whelming to them at times. But in the end, their number one concern is the well-being of their daughter and her happiness.
So I will write the letter as they have requested. I will tell whomever reads it what I observed knowing that my background in early childhood education as well as caregiver/grandmother to two of my other grandchildren gives me the benefit of doubt that I might just know what I’m talking about.
What I won’t say in the note, but will say now is how proud I am of my daughter and her husband. It took them two years of fertility clinic visits and then when they gave up trying, my daughter got pregnant. They never forget that Lexi is a gift from God. They also know that her emotional problems are minor compared to children with life-threatening problems and they thank God for that as well. They do the best they can to do what is right for their daughter even if it means sacrificing things they might want to do but are wary of doing under the circumstances. No one knows how brave they are to take their daughter out in public, shopping, eating out, birthday parties, or family gatherings. This is because they never know what might trigger a “melt down” as we call her episodes. But everyone knows instantly when they meet Lexi, they are meeting a beautiful gifted child. One of her uncles, (my oldest son) said she has a deep soul and a way of penetrating your thoughts looking inside you. Her smile and laughter and love for her family, including aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents is extremely strong and I give her mother and father credit for this. For they have raised her to be proud, kind, gentle, and loving with a heart bigger than her tiny little body.
I don’t doubt that Lexi will survive this time in her life; that she will grow to become the woman she is meant to be; that I will live another twenty years to see her as she sees herself now – whole, well, happy, and good for she is a Child of God.
Lifetime Writing 